I am not going to edit this, so please excuse the spelling and grammatical errors. Editing is the death nell for my blogs. I edit them to death.
Tonight Angie and I are going to celebrate our 9th anniversary. The actual date isn't until next week, but you take a babysitter when you can get one. You have no idea how amazing it is to me to have been married for 9 years. I am what you might call difficult to live with. I believe that it has taken strength, courage, and hope to deal with me for the last 11 or 12 years.
Let me tell you why. I am one of probably a few people that had their dad speak at their high school graduation. I am grateful that he and I both have that. The funny thing about it is that I can remember 1 line from that address. He said that I was never any trouble growing up. I am sure that is hyperbole, but still that means alot. I have thought about that one line for 16 years now. I never knew what it meant. Then this week during our weekly phone call (which I am also grateful for) mom told me that I never complained. Again, the rosy glasses of time have tempered her view I am sure. I have been working by myself for the past week and have been, as I usually am, deep in thought. I have spent my life living inside of myself. I have always known this, and I don't think it is surprise to anyone else. The thing about living inside of yourself is that you rarely live on the outside. I am rarely emotionally available. I can be pensive, short, and emotionally withdrawn. The introduction of children tempered that a little bit, I think. I have been, and will probably continue be emotionally underdeveloped. I believe that I am a good guy, a good dad, and a good husband. But I know that I am difficult.
I wanted to say this publicly. Not so that I could be broken down or analyzed or really even for you to think about me. I wanted to say them so that Angie would know that I appreciate her.
I love her and appreciate her and will be grateful to be old and gray with her.
Happy Anniversary, Angie!
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3 comments:
This post made me cry, Seth. I don't know why. Tears are welcome, though, so thanks.
I am impressed that you are so self aware. Because you do tend to live inside of yourself, the moments that you share are sometimes astounding. I'm just glad to get to be here for one now and then.
Angie is incredibly suited to you and I can see how both of you are lucky for having the other. Congratulations on nine years of marriage to a wonderful person - also on having a babysitter. Love you both!
It is funny I would check your blog tonight! I always read all my childrens blogs but don't always "get it" and you told me once that was ok! But yours I "got". And I hope you think that is a good thing! Congratulations on 9 years, and many more.
Love You Both
Mom
I'm glad this one didn't get edited to death. This is one that definitely needed to live and be read. Thanks for putting it out there.
I love and respect you and Angie and who you guys are together as a couple and as parents.
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