On the wings of the stars

As the sun sets on my humble home
It rises on a troubled people far away
Throughout the night they encouraged
Themselves and their brothers by shouting
Allah u Akbar, Allah u Akbar!

Tonight, in a far away land I raise my voice
I tell those who can hear me
That I am your brother
I offer you encouragement, through my cries
Allah u Akbar, Allah u Akbar!

I hope as darkness settles on your troubled land
The wings of the stars have carried my voice
To be mingled with yours
One in a chorus of hope, peace and love
Allah u Akbar, Allah u Akbar!

Our faces will never meet, but our words will
Ring in the ears of your oppressors
They ring in mine day and night
May all of humanity cry out until there is peace
Allah u Akbar, Allah u Akbar!

Ernest Hemingway, meet the Gaurdian Council

At this time of struggle for the Iranians I am reminded of Ernest Hemingway. During the early 20th century he went to other nations to help the people decide how they wanted to be governed. I can understand the pull of Arabs to Iraq to fight americans. I believe in self determination. I don't understand the government that they will chose, but I support them in their struggle. It seems to me (and I may be wrong) the difference between the 1920's and 30's in europe and today in the middle east is that back then the us government stayed out of it. Today the hawks in our government are calling for us to go into iran to protect the protestors. Although that may seem a noble idea, it is the wrong thing to do. When we send our army in, we tend to try to give them american democracy at gun point. Although it may get uglier, they have to do these things themselves. I hope there are those that struggle with them physically and the attention span of the world is long enough to stay focused on them. At night I stand outside and yell to a god I don't believe in because I want to take part in their struggle. I want them and everyone around me to know that I am iranian too.
As a side note- I read an article on the ethics of changing ones place and timezone to Tehran's. There was a good discussion on the side effects of changing them. My thought on the subject was that in the digital age, we are standing up saying "I am Spartacus!"
Today and for the forseeable future, I AM IRANIAN! Allahu Akbar!

Can ag be sustainable?

In recent years studies have shown the harmful affects that the large amount of meat consumption has on our planet. This hurts me deeply. I have loved the livestock industry my whole life. I love the cows that I raise now. I have spent my whole life trying to be right were I am at this very moment. I am standing in my pasture watching my cows recline in the shade in the tall, cool grass while their calves prance around me. I am preparing to spend the next week in this very position. My life’s goal is to make a living at this very act. As I read the reports of harm created by commercial ag, I can think that it is not me. I am a small time operator. Those guys are creating the problem not me. But I am a link in their chain. I buy (and sell) their products. I sell them my calves.
I hate the fact that my desire feeds their system. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about it. It is these times where the other struggles in life don’t drown this out that I can ponder where I am and where I am going and where I should be going. As with all important things, there is no easy answer. I am a visionary. I can see where I want to be, but I can’t see the path. It reminds me of when I used to drive a tow truck in college. I spent many hours driving down familiar roads, but when I lifted my gaze past the hood of my truck I could see the beauty of Missouri. You would be surprised how far you can see from sections of I-70. But you have to remember you are on I-70. Even now, my eyes wander to the far flung skylines.
I wanted to express the cognitive dissonance of being an environmentally conscious cattleman, but I think I may have failed. I long for a time when a farm could pay for a farm. When you only needed 40 acres to provide for a family. When life started and ended in the same place (for people and animals). When we had sustainable agriculture. That has not been in my lifetime, my parent’s lifetime and only a portion of my grandparent’s. So I see my choices as behaving like the majority of american’s and pretending there is no elephant in the room or changing what I do in a drastic way. I don’t know what that entails. I can see the endpoint, but no path.

today I live, while tomorrow they die

Today is the national day of action for Troy Davis. Today I continue to do what I did yesterday, will do today and tomorrow and the day after that. In the near future while I am building a corral or filtering vegetable oil or feeding cows or playing with kittens, dogs, cats or boys Troy Davis will be killed. My life will go on. His will not. For what purpose? Not only is it very likely he is innocent of what he is accused of, but your government wants to kill him. They want to put him a little room and snuff out his life. Is that okay with you? In this busy time in our lives, take a couple of minutes and reflect on state sanctioned homicide. Your state has no more right to kill you than it does to kill Troy Davis, KSM, or any other person it deems unfit to live.
Please visit this amnesty international website to learn more about the unjust stats of american death penalty usage.

We are all Troy Davis. If we allow one unjust act after another to take place in our name, we will all be affected. You are farther from the bottom than Troy Davis, so it may take longer to reach you, but you will touched by injustice.

Stand up and take action!

Easy to raise, Hard to live with

I am not going to edit this, so please excuse the spelling and grammatical errors. Editing is the death nell for my blogs. I edit them to death.

Tonight Angie and I are going to celebrate our 9th anniversary. The actual date isn't until next week, but you take a babysitter when you can get one. You have no idea how amazing it is to me to have been married for 9 years. I am what you might call difficult to live with. I believe that it has taken strength, courage, and hope to deal with me for the last 11 or 12 years.

Let me tell you why. I am one of probably a few people that had their dad speak at their high school graduation. I am grateful that he and I both have that. The funny thing about it is that I can remember 1 line from that address. He said that I was never any trouble growing up. I am sure that is hyperbole, but still that means alot. I have thought about that one line for 16 years now. I never knew what it meant. Then this week during our weekly phone call (which I am also grateful for) mom told me that I never complained. Again, the rosy glasses of time have tempered her view I am sure. I have been working by myself for the past week and have been, as I usually am, deep in thought. I have spent my life living inside of myself. I have always known this, and I don't think it is surprise to anyone else. The thing about living inside of yourself is that you rarely live on the outside. I am rarely emotionally available. I can be pensive, short, and emotionally withdrawn. The introduction of children tempered that a little bit, I think. I have been, and will probably continue be emotionally underdeveloped. I believe that I am a good guy, a good dad, and a good husband. But I know that I am difficult.
I wanted to say this publicly. Not so that I could be broken down or analyzed or really even for you to think about me. I wanted to say them so that Angie would know that I appreciate her.
I love her and appreciate her and will be grateful to be old and gray with her.

Happy Anniversary, Angie!

Rage Against the Machine

I was reading about the Milgram Experiment. We all have heard about how the study shows the harm that humans are willing to exert on others when told to so by authority figures, but that is not what intrigued me the most. In one of the many replications of the study, they added additional participants. These "participants" were there to voice their concern about the treatment of the "subjects." There was an increased chance that the person administering the electrical shock would quit if he had another dissenting voice.



Well, that is what I intend to do. I intend to voice my strong opinions. If we are all silent, we will all just remain silent.

It is known that I have strong views, but I have held my tongue for fear of ridicule or further alienation. But I don't see the purpose of things like a blog, a tweet, or a facebook if you can't lay it out there every once in a while.

Feel free to disagree vocally. Just don't get upset. I can assure you that we will disagree, but I try to never think poorly of someone because of what they think. As long as you are willing to hear me out, I will hear you out.